United Kingdom • 46 y/o • MaleReviews Given
You don't have a story here yet, Matthew. It's mainly a collection of scattered ideas, loosely strung together with poor grammar. I'd recommend you took a more sensible approach to your writing if you want to find an audience for it.
Sorry, this makes no sense to me. You need to use proper punctuation and grammar if you want to be a writer.
Your story is let down by poor grammar.
Poor grammar and dialogue punctuation is hampering your work. Please make sure that you spell-check before posting. It only comes across as lazy otherwise, and you don't want that.
I love micro fiction because of stories like this one. The first line sounds very differently when read a second time. :)
Keep up the writing!
A couple of dialogue punctuation errors, but otherwise a pretty funny tale. Reminiscent of Monty Python delight.
You've obviously decided to ignore the submission guidelines. Bad form.
Not sure what you're trying to say with this piece. It's too short and disjointed at the moment.