United States • 21 y/o • FemaleReviews Received
actually you can still see the moon during the daytime but I still get the message this poem is trying to send
Kind of like how if you look at someone and assume they're struggling you'll be right, you can look at a problem or realistic story and assume it has been or will be a reality at one point.
If the darkess and depression in this story exist just because, it may do more harm than good to the readers. I mean this in the best way. With extreme sadness, you can bring characters through storms (and therefore readers) but unless there's a note of hope, or even a semi-happy ending, it won't quite be an honest story at all. Emotionally wrecking myself at the hands of a story should leave healing potential, or I'll be left wondering if it was worth it.
I think this has enormous potential and wish you luck on whatever you decide to write. (Whether this story or a different one.)
This feels like a first draft, as some of the dialogue is a little rough and somethings aren't as clear as they maybe can be, but I'm actually really interested in the Devil's Boy. I can safely say that if I read this in a library, I'd check the book out.
Also, don't feel pressure to get the first draft perfect. I know from experience that if you try to make your beginnings perfect, writing anything other than beginnings is extremely difficult.
I love reading these, especially when you know the person lol.
I loved how intriguing this was! Great job.