United States • 23 y/o • FemaleReviews Given
Whoa. This story is great. I really would like to see where this is going to lead. Great work!
The story itself was good, and cute. I noticed a few errors in the story though, which can be easily fixed. Very cute little story!
The story is a good idea. However there were many errors, luckily they're very easy to fix. I noticed that your dialogue was a little mixed up, every time someone else talks you start a new line. Like this...
"How's you're day Julia?" Tom asked
"Very well thank you for asking" Responded Julia
Other than that the story was pretty good. I hope to see more from you.
I love the idea of this story. It's unique and I believe it had a message. Just a side not but in pativular parts the story would get a little sloppy. Otherwise I really liked this peice.
I've been keeping track of this series and the ending of this scene just blew my mind. I can't wait for the next one!
I would love it if you continued this series. The entries aren't quite as long as what would be most suitable but they're fine considering they're the very first few. I like how this story is going along and I'd like to see more.
I want to just start off with-I absolutely love, love, love, that poem he had wrote for her. However there are a few little hiccups in the story that cause it to be a tad bit confusing. Overall I liked it though.
Personally I believe that every story, or poem is meant to make the audience feel something, whether it be happiness, or sadness. And this story seemed to give off a lot of emotion, it makes the reader feel something, which is what I think the whole point is. Good job