United States • 21 y/o • MaleReviews Given
This is phenomenal. I can't remember reading anything so captivating and tragic. This story went places I didn't expect, and I'm just sitting here stunned because this idea is so good.
The one, ONE thing that I think could use some work is your sentence length; there could be a few more short sentences. (but personally I feel like the longer, continuous sentences create a sense of helpless repetition that suits the story perfectly.)
Anyway, I love this so much.
This makes me think of a book I've been reading, "12 Rules For Life" by Jordan Peterson. One of the rules he suggests is "Compare yourself to who you were yesterday, not to who someone else is today." We're all extremely flawed, and comparing ourselves to other people (or worse, comparing them to us) doesn't help anyone improve.
I'm worried about Everli....
Lemmie just hold my thoughts until I finish the next part.
I refuse. I refuse. No. This is no. I want more Everli.
THIS IS NOT OKAY.
I want Everli back.
This is very good.
Here's my rating again. Ugh, I can't believe I deleted that.
Wow that tone shift halfway through was brutal. This hit me hard.