Lyn

aw, man, i cant do sexual things- let me know when it gets back to normal so I can hop back in tho! For your typos, I suggest Grammarly. It can be wrong sometimes, so u have to keep an eye on it, but most of the time it's really helpful! I don't think Valentine is the right Match for Theodosia. He seems unable to understand the fact that a woman is more than an object, as he said, "Are you going to take advantage of me?" It sounds to me like he just wants to, uh, take advantage of her. I don't really like him. I'm also mad at Dorian now though, for leaving his sister alone for so many years. I hope their relationship can mend. And in the meantime, maybe he can save Theodosia from Valentine's greedy personality.

I'm not good at poetry and I haven't seen much about Dream SMP, but I think you did pretty good. Also, try using shift+enter when creating a stanza, then just use enter for a new stanza.

The tragedy of losing someone dear to you. You tied this to a close very well, good job! It's like a half-story-half-poem and I like that. I do have to say that it's kind of hard to keep up with, though. The repetition of "who are you?" made me want to skip every other line. Maybe consider making the other lines a bit longer or taking out some of those "who are you" 's. Or maybe I'm just really lazy, who's to say? Other than that, it was really good!

Wow, how intense-
I didn't think it would escalate that quickly!
Maybe separate the paragraphs a bit more. It's harder to read the first few paragraphs because of how mixed up they are. Other than that, you did really well!

GOOD LUCK!!!

I enjoyed this. I liked how you said they went for “the ghastly kill.” That topped it off nicely. Thanks for sharing.

Nooo, i dont want my imaginary friends to fade. Writing about them shall keep them alive >:3
A lovely story, though. I think it might sound better if the imaginary friend acted as a child might, though. Instead of calling Timothy "dear," try calling him "buddy" or something. there were a few grammatical mistakes, but those are easily overlooked. Over all, it was pretty good! I enjoyed reading it :)

There is a lot of potential here! A handful of your grammatical errors are quite easy to fix, and that will entice readers to stay longer to read a bit more. If you want some advice or want to ask me to shut up, feel free to message me.