Andy (Formerly Apemann)

An interesting submission - but take care with your work. It is spoiled a little by your lack of attention to detail. Use your computer's spell-check and thesaurus to avoid unnecessary grammar, spelling and punctuation errors. DO keep writing, though!

This story is not without faults, but overall it works well.

Although your story breaks the 'rules' of writing, understanding what you were trying to achieve with this work makes it permissible to break those rules in this instance. Well done!

Some large philosophical questions :-) Nicely written and presented.

I like the upbeat and positive message your short poem offers. Nice work :-)

Interesting poem. Your credits in the 'author's notes' box are unnecessary...

Regrettably not all of your poems follow the true haiku 5-7-5 syllables rule. However, an interesting - if somewhat macabre - collection.

This piece is good, but slightly spoiled by its 'wordiness'. Some of your sentences are unnecessarily wordy and over-descriptive:

"We stay up late into the night talking, confiding our secrets in each other, showing our burning desires without flinching while looking into the faces of each other's truths and faults"

This feels as though your are trying to impress readers with your vocabulary, but you don't need to. You are good enough story-teller without having to load every sentence with as many words as you can think of. Sometimes the less you write the better it reads...