United States • 56 y/oReviews Received
The pigeon and what it left is a witty touch. I've heard before that people in dry climates welcome rain so that rings true. In my native Britain rain means gloom, but I can see why things would be different in a desert.
Children will probably like how the parrot goes from zero to hero. It would take more than 20 parrots to right the ship but you're using a surreal premise all along so you might get away with it. Its a nice twist at the end.
I'm not great when it comes to the technicalities of poetry but I relate to the sentiments expressed here. There's emotional truth in it.
Overall your descriptions are good. Just one thing, 'clutched' the guitar would be better than 'engulfed.' If you engulf something you cover it completely. One hand would'nt cover the whole guitar. Otherwise well done.
Yo, I love the movie Ghost. Finely written.
What a wonderful story! Well done!