IanG

A convincing account of how a teenager would feel towards an absent parent. Love can exist outside of a biological family, people have found it when factors beyond their parents control, like war or natural disasters, have parted them.

When it comes to other families, people can have problems they don't share whether face to face or on social media.

Our time isn't the first when people have questioned traditional gender roles. It happened when men went off to fight in both world wars and women took over jobs that had once been theirs. They didn't do it to prove a point but to keep the economy going until peace returned. It happened when women first got the vote. That said, some people were nostalgic for a happy time years before and so tried to resist or slow the process of change.

I agree that change must come from within rather than by changing appearances.

At first it seems like things will never be all right again. Then there's a period when some days are not bad and others are horrible again. Don't be afraid to ask for support.

My mother died four years ago. She didn't take her own life but I know it takes time to get back on an even keel. Things are never the same again, but that first surge of grief and bewilderment won't last. You can't put a timetable on recovery, it takes different people in different ways.

Its good that you're advising others in a similar situation, it shows courage and optimism. I hope things get better for you soon.

The twist is good and took me by surprise. Just one thing, a twist needs to be prepared for without giving too much away. If your narrator says, while making up, that she seldom gets a chance to relax or have fun it implies that she has a tough job. If as you imply she goes undercover in dangerous situations, it anticipates the twist but holds some information back. Keep it up.

You could've told us more about what you and Charlie did together, games you played, music you listened to and so on. That would be a more subtle way of showing his character. That said, there are good descriptive passages here and the nostalga is heartfelt. Many people will relate to the theme of a warm but lost friendship.

We are surrounded by images of people who are physically perfect. It puts a lot of pressure on us to measure up. Try to remember celebrities have a lot of help from make up artists and even personal trainers. Teenagers in films are often portrayed by twenty somethings. Photos can even be airbrushed. Most of us are not so lucky. Just because you don't look like your favourite singer or actor, it doesn't make you a failure.

I'm glad Wolf made it in the end.
I'd have put a little more suspense in the opening blurb. I'd have put 'will he turn his life around?' instead of saying he does. The actual story is good.