Reviews Received
while i appreciate the boldness you have, you might want to change the audience. it's just a language and subject issue
I agree with the premises of the idea of 'stop having women be sexualized objects', fully agree on that. They are people. Living beings that have emotions, thoughts, reasons and a life of their own just like everyone else.
Though there are two concepts that I understand what you are getting at, yet I feel they are misrepresented or misunderstood (unless I'm reading it wrong), but the idea of women's sports getting paid less, usually that is based on ratings and skill-set as seen most dominantly between the NBA and WNBA.
For the 'patriarchy' idea. Well, I mean, was it really the 'patriarchy' that made or contributed to the way it is? Personally, I don't think so. I believe cultural values that have passed overtime has resulted in such things to happen like such cause and effect relations. Once abortion was legalized along with the idea of divorce being 'okay', rates of rape and sexual assault, unprotected sex and of course, abortion rose to higher levels than they were before such things were acceptable.
Patriarchy isn't just about men, but how society is worked as a whole with everyone. Same with Matriarchy and all other forms. There can never be true dominance until one group crumbles to the ground and it can't be true dominance if there are separate roles as to which each side possesses that can't be put on the same scale.
Patriarchy isn't the same as cultural values (in terms of separating the two concepts because most people seem to jumble them into the same idea). Patriarchy is based on set of mostly (keyword: mostly) characterful beliefs that are actually expected of all sides to co-exist in peace and well being for all by teaching from The Bible whereas cultural values is the idea what is deemed 'acceptable' and what 'isn't' from society itself.
Can the two overlap? Of course. How do we value which side is in the wrong or right? Who really knows?
Sorry I wrote an essay, but I just wanted to put my two cents in on this topic because I find this pretty intriguing and have been in discussions about this before with many people.
I appreciate it when boldness like this comes to terms with reality. Gives a moment for us to actually think and reflect on what we do and why.
A man is born through a woman, and he is raised by a woman, and he falls in love with a woman, and he marries a woman. And I am surprised about the man, who don't respect a woman.
Not too shabby. Not too shabby.
For structure it is pretty good. Have the description of glass and the variations of each shattered piece in a unique and humanistic way.
I sense that it could be more concise. To get the words to stick some lines could be shortened such as an example,
"Some are bright and warm and happy
Some are alive, some are dead"
It could be,
"Some bright, warm, happy
Some alive, dead"
I think that would age well making it shorter with no filler or extra words.
To your point imaging yourself as shattered glass, along with the last two lines, it's relatable to the masses. Feeling useless ourself, but useful for others. Maybe we serve our purpose to serve others and not ourselves. Maybe we desire the want of approval from others, but tear ourselves down. Maybe we see more faith in others for the unknown compared to one's self?
See and hear it all the time. Stories of those who have fallen in despair and wretchedness in society, but still lend grace and help to those in need. It doesn't even have to be drastic. Just donating a couple of bucks when we/you are in a financial bind or volunteering at a food pantry is a difference of help.
So why help others when one's self could be or is lost?
Makes you feel good? Think good karma is on the way? Gain attention and approval? Make the world a lively place? Respect for others? Been in a similar situation?
I'm not sure. It's not for me to say. But I'm sure the individual doing such has a clearer answer.