Kat

I think it was a great plot line, and the character does seem like she is in the fifties/ a teenager! Great job!

I love how you made it not rhyme but still seem catchy. It's hard to do that! You are a very talented writer. Can't wait to hear more!

Sounds great, trust me. The parts could be a little longer but besides that I believe that you're all good👍🏻

I think Apeman (sorry if I got the name wrong) is partially right. A series of sad stories isn't bad when you know that you can produce happier, livelier stories that make your heart swell or eyes tear. I think that the story was amazing and I know that you continued with it because I saw the titles for the next ones, so good job!
-KP

Holy cow!! That's great!! Are you going to write more? When you're talking about wondering if the dude is hung to split her in half you accidentally say my instead of me, but besides that I found no more errors.

Wow, that was cool. You think you are going to write more? That would be awesome. I'm hooked. :) -Kaleigh

I feel like this every time I get committed to a story (at least twice a day 😜). Sometimes it get so frustrating you want to scream (and sometimes you do). Very well written. I love it!

That's almost definitly me! I daydream continuously but I don't think that it's that big. I can snap out of it if I want to, but I usually don't want to. Great work!!
-KP